Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Collegiate II

So... yeah, college.

Last I talked I mentioned checking out Carrington for medical coding. Money-wise, I feel it's risky for me to go into something that, while bread and butter, have zero enthusiasm nor interest in.

Heck, as it wasn't even my choice in the first case, I've been left depressed at being dictated and "smothered" into what I do not want to go into.

I do not wish to invest more loan debt into something I know I will not be enthusiastic on but coerced into by internal/external nanny necessity who presume by my behaviour that I will by no means survive as an adult let alone am responsible enough to. Granted, having been in such an environment for two years hasn't helped much. I've started to believe in this self doubt (which, to my chagrin has caused further delays in projects that would possibly help in long term). It isn't fun, but I'm not sure how to escape and rebuild my confidence.


After discussing family on this over weekend, I've come to call off Carrington, to my relief. However, I still need to look further, to chagrin, in regards to career (I just wanna do what I love, however laughable that is for a millennial... god I hate that term). In essence, I'm  more lost and confused as to what to do. Looking into tech but not sure what field, just something that can occupy my Cogswell loan while I'm able to work on my project. Animation is still a passion and aim for me (however weak it may feel now due to inistial disillusion), and I would still be in such a school if it weren't for the Gen Eds preventing me from doing anything of animation beyond basic form.

Enough rambling, I shall see my options... just let me ponder.

Hasta marfle!

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